Madness’s Mock NBA Draft

In honor of Draft day Dumb has compiled a Madness Mock Draft.  As insufferable as he is it’s not bad.  Forgive any spelling mistakes I had to translate from crayon.

1) Clippers: Blake Griffin (Bet the house on it, unless they trade the pick)

2) Memphis Grizzlies: Hasheem Thabeet (They need a shotblocker and there’s no one better at that in this draft.)

3) Oklahoma City: Ricky Rubio (Rubio, Westbrook, Green, Durant, Gasol. Reminds me of where the Blazers were 2 years ago, except Gasol isn’t a gimp like Oden and Durant is better than anyone Portland has.)

4) Kings: Jrue Holliday (Kings need a PG, Jrue reminds a lot of people of Westbrook. Playing for Howland, he’s ridiculous on D. But this is the Kings, and they’ll probably draft Jonny Flynn)

5) MinnesotaJordan Hill (My sources tell me Minnesota will package this and one of their later picks to move up and get Thabeet. If not, Hill fits the bill)
6) Minnesota T-Wolves: James Harden (Hopefully he’s more Eric Gordon than Randy Foye. No, two Randy Foyes are NOT better than 1)

7) Golden State: Brandon Jennings (Jennings, Monte, Cpt Jax/Magette, Randolf and Biedrins, is a REALLY athletic future. If they can somehow get B Dizzle back to the Bay this year, they could have a playoff team in the near term too)

New York Knicks: Stephen Curry (Since the Knicks are really just looking towards 2010 anyways, Curry presents the opportunity for big upside and little downside. He has star potential in D’antoni’s system. He made DAVIDSON relevent. I don’t think ESPN will show any Davidson games in primetime next year.)

9) Toronto Raptors: Tyreke Evans (Evans should get the nod over DeRozan and Terrence Williams because the Raptors need a scorer.)

10) Milwaukee Bucks: Jonny Flynn (Bucks need a PG and Flynn should be ok. It’s the Buck, they’re just OK too.)

11) New Jersey Nets: DeJuan Blair (This guy’s a beast. I hope it carries over to the NBA.)

12) Charlotte Bobcats: Gerald Henderson (UNC players aren’t working out for Bob’s Cats, lets try a Duke Dork!)

13) Indiana Pacers: DeMar DeRozan (I guess Reggie Miller’s not there anymore since he was all over lame commercials during the playoffs, so SG?)

14) Phoenix Suns: Earl Clark (Athleticism and the Suns go hand in hand.)

15) Detroit Pistons: BJ Mullens (Rasheed’s gettin old, BJ anyone?)

16) Chicago Bulls: James Johnson (Johnson’s a big tough PF, the anti Tyrus Thomas)

17) Philadelphia 76’ers: Eric Maynor (Maynor beat Duke in the NCAA tourney. You have to love him if just for that.)

18) Minnesota Timberwolves: Ty Lawson (Randy Foye is not a PG, Lawson would be a good fit here)

19) Atlanta Hawks: Nick Calathes (Calathes has skills like another Former Gator, Jason Williams. Yes, they’re both white, hence the comparison)

20) Utah Jazz: Tyler Hansborough (Hansborough is the PERFECT Jazz: just a tough, reboundin’, team-first SOB. When was the last time two non-European white boys got picked back to back in the top-20? I must’ve fucked up somewhere).  What other State outside of Utah would dance moves like this be considered mainstream?

21) New Orleans Hornets: Terrence Williams (Williams is athletic and a good SG for this team)

22) Dallas Mavericks: Jeff Teague (If Teague falls here (ATL will swoop him up if they’re smart) then the mavericks may well have found J Kidd’s replacement)

23) Sacramento Kings: Danny Green (He can hit 3′s and will help the Kings offensively. Plus Green is the color of the Iranian Opposition movement. They need a shout-out)

24) Portland Trailblazers: Sam Young (another guy who could score points for Portland and he can help on the defensive end too)

25) Oklahoma City: Chase Budinger (Budinger can play the 2 and 3, adding depth)

26) Chicago Bulls: Austin Daye (Another Tyrus Thomas. But we saw what that did in the playoffs when Tyrus played hard.)

27) Memphis Grizzlies: Jeff Pendergraph (Big Dude, doesn’t need the ball alot. When O.J. Mayo’s your PG, you better hope you can play without the ball)

28) Minnesota Timberwolves: Taj Gibson (3 draft picks is a good thing in the NFL. It’s not a good thing in the NBA, especially for a team as young as Minnesota. If they keep all three, Gibson could fit nicely next too Jefferson and Love)

29) Los Angeles Lakers: Darren Collison (Collison is quick and can play crazy D, being a Howland guy. Since the Lakers only real weakness is quick little PG’s like Aaron Brooks, Collison would be a nice fit)

30) Cleveland Cavaliers: DeJuan Summers (Summers will get open looks with the quadruple-teams LeBron gets and, unlike the guys Cleveland has right now, he can actually score)